Empathy For All

Raising a daughter is no easy task. Having watched her be the object of older kids picking on her but not understanding what they're doing and still wanting to play with them, it really challenged my idea of forgiveness and what I can learn from a playground. The idea of forgiveness isn't one that we place enough value on. In a society having been and currently raising people to expect their own way, on their terms, when they want it-it makes a perfect recipe for a shortage of empathy in everyday social interactions. It's easy to look at the conflict or frictions within our daily lives and see those experiences simply as offenses against us. The internet being down. Traffic on your daily commute. The to-go order being wrong from the restaurant. To take a consumeristic approach built upon the foundation that I deserve exactly what I want, and those things go against what I want so they're terrible. If I've been conditioned to be the king, any interaction or encounter where I'm not treated as such will inevitably result in me being upset. There's no need for empathy when I'm the center of the universe. But what if we viewed the world differently, with the idea that we're all in this together? The internet being down isn't such an inconvenience considering the daily blessings we get on a daily basis. Traffic is an opportunity to be thankful we have reliable transportation. The wrong order at a resultant can be easily excused as the server is over worked and exhausted. For most of us, our empathy flows in and out throughout the day. And I think that if we're being honest, we could all use more of it. The example of Christ's interactions with his family, friends and all of society was rooted in empathy. He saw through their actions, their attitudes and their worldviews to see a person who held value. That's what did and does set Him apart and what ought to drive us to seek empathy in our everyday interactions. It's easy within conflict to take a hard stance feeling that we are 'right' and any movement from the position that we're right would be weakness. And perhaps, maybe in a rare situation it might be. But in the majority of interactions we have on a daily basis between family, coworkers, and our circles of society, refusing to seek reconciliation after conflict only creates toxicity. The inability to work at understanding another's reasons for their action or inaction isn't a strength, but rather a hinderance. I recently heard a pastor say "Regardless of who you hate, the people around you get the worst of it." We may take a hard stance refusing to seek resolution with a family members or coworker, but are they the ones who really feel the wrath of our frustration? Almost never. Instead it gets spilled out to those closest to us, ruining hours, days, or weeks with misplaced frustration. So what's a solution? Put simply, view conflict of as an opportunity for empathy. Cheesy and overly simple? Sure. But I know the burden of anger and annoyance is far too heavy to carry it any significant distance.  By Mitchell Moyer